I stumbled into the lobby of the Hilton San Diego Bayfront Hotel in San Diego, but not out of being drunk. Not in the alcoholic sense. Whatever kind of drunk you can get from your first day at your first Comic Con, this was what I was on.

It took me long enough to take in the regular spectacle, before I actually got to attend my first panel. In fact, it was the last one for “Dexter” to honor its ongoing final season. As if that wasn’t enough when it was over, I got my way through a crowd of autograph seekers and got a signature from “Dexter” femme fatale Yvonne Strahovski.

I spent the first minute in my lobby chair studying that signature, then the next few going over all my other new memorabilia. I went back to the autograph as I heard someone walking nearby, then heard someone plop into the chair next to me.

I turned my head to give a courtesy look at whoever was next to me. Then I gave another look after the first one seemed too ludicrous to believe.

“Are you in a costume?” I blurted out before I knew better. Then again, if I didn’t know better, I would swear that Yvonne Strahovski was sitting next to me. It was far more likely that one of the female Comic Con nerds was dressing as her for the day – though I probably would have seen her at or near the Dexter panel.

This woman had on the exact same polka dot white dress Yvonne had at the panel. So maybe this was a mega fan with creepy, suspicious accuracy in her costume. Then again, Yvonne didn’t have a signature costume to impersonate on “Chuck” or “Dexter” – unless the Weinerlicious outfit on Chuck and the saran wrap on that one Dexter counted. Sadly, this woman had none of those on.

“Not today,” the woman commented, interrupting my analysis. But the fact that she spoke in an Australian accent – one Yvonne never used on TV, and one I had heard quite recently on the panel – gave me much more to go on.

When it all finally dawned on me, I narrowly kept myself from gasping. I’d already embarrassed myself enough. “Oh God, of course, duh,” I said anyway. “I just saw you, so why would….”

“You….oh, right, you did!” the woman who really was Yvonne Strathovski realized, actually remembering me and actually smiling.

“Yeah. Hello again….Yvonne,” I paused before looking at her autograph, pretending to need it to remember her name. Even without that, the blond hair, piercing blue eyes, big smile, long, crossed legs and silky accent should have been the final giveaways. But she kept her big smile on as I introduced myself, nonetheless.

With that out of the way, I actually took in how she was relaxing after a long day at Comic Con, just like me. “Exhausted? I thought you were a veteran around here,” I pointed out casually, if not more casually than I probably should have.

“Yes, but it’s still overwhelming each time. No matter what fan base you talk to,” Yvonne noted.

“As a first timer who’s never been on a panel before, I can only imagine,” I explained.

“First time? You’re a Comic Con virgin?” Yvonne nearly made me choke on air.

When I recovered, I went on autopilot to add, “That sounds about right. You could say I popped my Comic Con cherry on your panel,” I did say. I figured I’d go on until she slapped me, but she kept looking amused instead. I wouldn’t go so far as to say I wasn’t a Comic Con virgin like…..some virgins at this convention, though – but I was thinking it.

“Well, from one veteran to a newcomer, I’m honored to take your v-card. That’s the right way to say it here, right?” Yvonne checked. It was the right way in a bunch of ways.

“Just about. It’s even better with a toast, though,” I was emboldened enough to offer. “Let me go get the glasses and drinks from the hotel bar.”

I really was on autopilot, or something else where I was out of my mind. Tempting my good first day fortune with the comic gods – and the other gods in town – like this was bound to end badly. Yet Yvonne still didn’t slap or chide me, so I took her order, got us both drinks at the bar, and came back with the necessary tools for a toast.

“A toast to Comic Con. You never forget your first,” Yvonne stated. I brushed aside how she kept harping on that, and toasted her as instructed.

“Here here. And don’t worry. Other fans might shoot for the moon and ask for stuff they’ve only fantasized about, but not me,” I assured. I added just enough of a leer to make her think I meant….something physical. Obviously, it was a convincing leer, considering who I was leering at.

But it was only for a second, just to give her the idea. Then before she really could think about slapping me, I added, “You guys gave enough teasers at the panel anyway. Not really, but I can handle the suspense for 10 more weeks.”

Yvonne unsettlingly paused for a second, then seemed to roll her eyes comically while holding back a laugh. Still, she stuck around and took a sip, so I took one from my drink. Now that I’d joked about vague sexual stuff and got it out of the way, it wouldn’t be a problem the rest of the night. Whether it was one beforehand or not.

Yvonne did say some stuff about the very last days of shooting on Dexter – which at most, was a hint that her murderous character would play some part in the finish. I filed that away as scoop, but by the time I came back with our second drinks, I got to asking about her own first time at Comic Con, when they screened the “Chuck” pilot in summer 2007.

“Well, that was a blast. Eventually,” Yvonne started. “I mean, before the screening, it was all just nerves and panic, really. First big acting job I’d ever done, first time screening it for an audience….not the easiest thing to look forward to. I had to use some tricks to calm myself down, but when it was over….I used them to celebrate. Even got someone to help me out.”

What kind of tricks worked like that? What kind other than the ones I couldn’t think about around her? “Tricks, huh?” I asked, just to move the conversation along.

“You know, it’s unfair what they say about this place just having geeky virgins,” Yvonne carried on. “There are some hot, virile ‘nerds’ all around here every year. They don’t even need slave costumes from 30 years ago!” Now that made my head play too many visual tricks on me.

As I shook them off, I heard Yvonne continue, “This really is a whole new world for new people. It can be overwhelming at first, but once you….relax and enjoy it, the rest is easy. I know what I’m talking about. I’m sure you will too.”

That would be a change of pace. And a few other things, if this was going….a certain way that seemed less and less outlandish. “I mean, you’ve been telling me you want to all night,” she went on. “This is your first time, and who know if I’ll get another show or movie by next year. Sounds like a fitting way to pass the torch.”

Funny choice of words, since the torch was getting too hot for me to handle. I figured I’d have to handle it myself as soon as I got back to my room. But if she was offering to make it a two person job….

She wasn’t, right?

But then she dropped her hand on my chair – on my leg, more specifically – and filled in the blanks with a penetrating, sultry glare on her gorgeous face. There was my answer.

When I found my breath again, I asked, “Where do you want to give it to me? The torch,” I caught myself at the end.

“We can try not to burn down your room first,” she answered. She was trying to be clever, although I hoped she wasn’t just being drunk. Two drinks shouldn’t have made her impaired, yet the offer suggested evidence to the contrary.

If Yvonne didn’t stumble or slur on the way up to my room, I figured I could do this guilt free. So I got up and had her walk side by side with me to the elevator, then got in and sent it to my floor. And as we walked to my room door, I didn’t see her sway or drunkenly giggle once.

Yet when we crossed the threshold and entered my new room, I felt one final need to get the gentlemanly stuff out of the way. “You’re sure you’re up for it? You’re not still exhausted from today?” I checked.

“Not yet,” Yvonne said suggestively.

With her back turned to me, I let my eyes trail up her sleek legs, gaze at the perky outline of her ass, and stop at the shoulders covered up by her dress straps. This inspired me to say, “Let me just make completely sure,” as a segway.

Ready to make sure Yvonne was completely relaxed, I put my hands on her for the first time. Instead of going for her breasts, ass or waist, I rested my hands on her shoulders and started rubbing. Yvonne stood still as I positioned myself behind her, just rubbing the parts of her shoulders covered by her dress. But when she let out her first soft moan, I slid her left strap down and went to work on her bare skin.

The smooth, sun kissed texture of her skin nearly got a quiet moan out of me. When I glided my thumb down to her collarbone, she moaned louder and sexier. This empowered me to get closer behind her, placing my face against her soft, honey scented blonde hair, while keeping my increasingly visible bulge just short of touching her ass. In the meantime, my right hand lowered her other dress strap to expose her right shoulder.

Yvonne took it a step further, walking forward a step to untie the string around her waist, before proceeding to remove the entire dress next. Her back was still turned, but I could still clearly see that her bra was blue – matching the blue panties that lifted and halfway covered her ass so delectably. But other than that, none of her taut, perfectly shaped back, ass or legs were covered.

Resisting the urge to turn her around and study her front half, I walked forward and resumed my massaging duties. Unlike before, I put my head down to her left shoulder, and gave it a tentative kiss when I stopped rubbing it. After kissing it again, I leaned my hips forward and made sure Yvonne’s ass could feel my bulge.

My hands finally left her shoulders and started to glide down her trim waist. But before they could reach her hips, Yvonne turned around, giving me time to stare at the front of her panties and bra. Once I took in enough of her shapely breasts, I looked up and was hypnotized by the sexiest, half lidded smolder and smile I’d ever seen.

I could only get lost in her eyes for a half-second, before she closed them and put her lips onto mine. When the initial sensation wore off, my hands picked up where they left off and went back on her waist. Her hands cupped both sides of my head, helping her lips to press deeper, and her tongue to glide in easier when it moved into my mouth.

Yvonne all but cooed into my mouth, causing me to open it up wider as she took it over. It felt like there was pure silk flooding my mouth, to say nothing of the feel of her backside once my hands reached over. Having given Yvonne her opening bit of fun, I finally joined in and gently began to let my tongue push hers back into her mouth, with mine closely following.

After a squeeze of her ass, my hands slid up her back and tried to work on her bra strap. I stopped halfway through, but I shot my right hand into her hair to keep her from breaking our kiss. Yvonne didn’t stop, and after my lips broke off and went down to her collarbone, my hands returned to finish unhooking the strap.

Although the bra was loose, I didn’t remove it, choosing to keep the cups on as my lips arrived at her breasts. I made sure the cups and their nicely bountiful cargo fit nicely in my hands, then teased Yvonne by licking her nipples through the cups. I tried to nibble on the fabric covering them, which made her groan more impatiently.

“Take them off,” Yvonne asked, her accent taking on a sultry timber. Just when I began to enjoy having control, she put her hand right on the front of my jeans, adding, “I can show you how it’s done.”

The concept of not removing Yvonne Strahovski’s bra right away was flimsy as it is. Now it was downright lunacy. So I threw the bra off, took in how her chest was firmer and rounder while uncovered, and began licking her nipples for real – right as Yvonne lowered my zipper.

I tried not to bite down on Yvonne’s right nipple too hard as her hand reached into my pants. Yet after her fingers glided down the front of my underwear for a moment, she removed her hand and got to work removing my shirt instead. It was only fair, but it was kind of cruel – which signaled I shouldn’t bite anything again, even if that wasn’t really her point.

Once I was shirtless too, I decided to take care of my pants myself. I removed them and left myself in just my underwear, like Yvonne. Thinking ahead, I backed her up until she bumped into the bed, then she took the hint and laid down flat on the mattress.

With Yvonne’s seductive, 90 percent naked body lying on complete display for me, I took my time settling myself over her. But I still set myself on top of her, savored our naked chests rubbing each other, then resumed work on kissing hers. Yet before I went too far below her breasts, Yvonne pulled a fast one.

In a move that would make Sarah Walker and Hannah McKay proud, Yvonne suddenly flipped me onto my back and put herself on top of me. Before I could catch my breath or even make a joke about her stunt work paying off, she turned around and set herself on top from a different angle.

She had her panty clad ass hovering over my face, while her face was hovering above my underwear clad erection. With the 69 position all set up, I scrambled to catch up and rise to the challenge. Yet Yvonne licked the evidence of how risen I really was, although it was still covered in underwear.

Paying her back, I licked the already wet front of her panties, then tried to move it aside with my teeth. Yvonne beat me to it, dipping her tongue into my underwear, then lifting it up just enough so she could lick my throbbing head. It would have been so hot to see, if my vision wasn’t clouded by Yvonne’s own throbbing genitals.

Leaving that aside for now, I lowered Yvonne’s panties to expose her firm ass and wet pussy. I gave it a long, wet lick of my own, yet Yvonne stuck to batting my cock head with her tongue. I felt her all but dig the tip of her tongue into my slit, until she finally grabbed my shaft and gave my head a deep, sudden suckle for one all too brief second.

I moaned right into Yvonne’s lower lips, pushing my mouth deeper into them as she kept suckling me every few seconds. To up the ante, my hands grabbed her ass as I attacked her harder with my tongue. Yvonne’s just teased my shaft as her mouth took me in deeper and longer – so she still had the winning strategy.

I removed my tongue from her pussy and started focusing on the back of her lovely legs. I licked her left upper thigh and began going down to her lower one, with my right thumb brushing her pussy every few seconds. I felt Yvonne taking me in deeper, but I kept my mouth on her leg – even when her mouth popped off my cock.

All I felt her do next was take my balls and start bouncing them up and down. I was in a precarious position, yet I kept teasing her and only briefly put the tip of my finger into her. When I took it out, both hands went down her thighs, then slid back up and got a hold of the sides of her breasts.

At that point, I didn’t feel her jiggling my balls anymore. Her right hand went off me altogether, then I heard a suckling noise – although she wasn’t suckling me.

My best guess was that she was sucking her finger like she sucked my cock, whether to get a substitute or just to torture me. Either way, once the suckling noises stopped, it took another few seconds until I felt her wet finger right below my balls. Moments later, I felt her tongue on that area.

In the 69 position, she couldn’t lick that much all the way down there. Perhaps that helped explain why she hopped off me at last, then turned back around and faced me as she lowered her head to my crotch.

With her right hand down below, doing the job to her pussy that I wasn’t, Yvonne took me with her left hand and stroked me as she licked underneath my balls. She then moved forward as her tongue slid up to her balls, up my shaft and over my slit and head. It left my cock altogether and just kept licking up my body, while the rest of her followed its lead.

Yvonne licked up to my chest as she crawled closer to me, her deep blue eyes never leaving mine. Her tongue didn’t leave my body as it glided past my own breast, reached my neck, lifted up to my chin and then effortlessly entered my mouth.

Although that tongue had tasted so much of my body already, I met it swipe for swipe. However, the swiping didn’t last very long, as she broke the kiss and turned her body around all over again. But this time, Yvonne didn’t hover her ass over my face.

Since my fingers fell down on the job and her own weren’t enough, Yvonne filled the gap herself with my own cock. The only problem – a slight one, really — was that she put herself in the reverse cowgirl position as she sat on my shaft. I wasn’t in position to complain as she settled myself into her, then got all the way down after a few bounces.

Once she sat her ass down and adjusted to my full cock inside of her, I made a move to touch her. Before I got there, I saw her own hands leave my sight, only to obviously go onto her breasts. She bounced her own tits out of my sight while riding my cock, which only seemed halfway fair.

But with her hands playing with herself up above, I could put mine back to work down below.

After Yvonne settled into her rhythm of riding me, my hands returned to work in grabbing her hips. My right hand soon went between her legs and beside her filled pussy. Without any more warning, my index finger went on top of her pussy and started rubbing it as fast as possible. To add on, my left hand grasped her hip as much as it could.

“Oh! Ah….oh, fuck,” Yvonne said for the first time. She got herself to keep riding me steadily, but I started thrusting so she wouldn’t have to do all the work. I pushed harder into her and rubbed faster, while Yvonne kept fondling her tits during the ride. But after I drove in harder, she put her hands down and tried to stable herself by putting them on my legs.

This gave me the opening to wrap my arms around her waist and pull her down, so that she was lying her back on my stomach. From that position, I rolled around and put her on her side, halfway doing what she did to me. I slipped out of her for a moment, but put myself right back in as we lay on our sides and spooned.